A few days ago i was having a conversation where we got to talking about the world and how its filled with allot of evils, and bad people and bad things and that it seems to get worse and worse every time we turn on the TV, watch the news , read the paper log onto the Internet or even in the case of other military spouses like myself. just looking outside our window and down out street.
i was then asked if i agree.
with all the bits and pieces of evidance stacked in front of me i would have to agree right ?
four years ago i would have.
i can agree that there is allot of evil in the world ! a ton ! far far too much
but as a person who has a disability? and is still (even after four years) learning to except it as a part of my identity.
EVERY DAY ! i am BLESSED with being able to see where there is still so much good.
strangers who ask me "do you need help?" or my favorite " may i help you ?"
they ask me if THEY can help me, if i would allow them too?
they open doors, move things to accommodate me and my chair. help me get things down in the store, ask me if i need help in and out of my car, help me with my groceries when i load the car. offer to pump my gass for me. if i ever need a sitter? "what can i help you with ?" people will ask. (sometimes i don't even know what i need help with). people ask me how i am? go out of their way to talk to me and get to know me. when i enter a room in some cases i can feel the resistance and reluctance to talk to me radiating off people and then in others i can feel their courtesy and curiosity about me and then in some the knowledge and understanding because they have been where i am or are close to some one who has similar struggles!
because of my disability i get the privilege on many occasions to deal with people who have chosen ! a career in caring for others! who want to help others, fire fighters, soldiers, Dr.s, nurses, child care workers, medical professionals. police officers. teachers ! not every one of them does it for the same reasons but you can tell the difference and understanding in the ones who are truly doing it to serve others and not them selves , sure i read and hear about the awful things going on in the world and even on my street but day to day and in my interactions with people i get so see how much good god is doing an d how he uses EVERY ONE ! and I'm still learning!!!!!
" there is a reason for every thing" people say it all the time. i don't know why i was in the car accidents i was in, i don't know why i was left disabled and am now confined to a wheel chair. it sucks! still i am so blessed in other ways and i don't think i would be able to appreciate them if it wasn't for this disability.
a woman in my bible study called me out and tried to convey to me that god can still use me. there are people out there that will reach out to me because of this. who have a spirit of compassion! who are drawn to help others no matter who or where they are at in life. and that god can use my situation to reach them. i don't know how true it is. but i knew that it was a nice thought. and i remember hearing or just feeling it maybe that just allowing my self to receive is just as good as giving cause it makes people feel good to know that they have helped. that they have made my day brighter and that it made things easier for me!
and in church last Sunday the act of service was brought up. and they got to speaking about how it doesn't have to be unpleasant cause what ever u are good at god can use you.
no matter how broken, damaged and regected you are god can use you. you just have to give you self to him.
all of this has just been on my heart the last few weaks and even more in the last few days and i just had to blog about it.
today was just one of thoughs days where i got to see how compassionate people can be. and i felt like i had to share.